I once had a boss who travels out frequently, and on his return, buys things for every of his staff; on this particular day, he had just returned with no smiling face and gifts as usual. I was so shocked to see people complain bitterly, how can he go all the way and not bring something? not even chocolate?
Today, am going to be talking about a common mentality, which is often called The Entitlement Mentality. Dictionary.com website defines it as: The fact of having a right to something and the amount to which a person has a right. Simply put, the right to something not earned. This right exists regardless of one having to do anything.
Let me explain:
We all seem to have one uncle, aunty, brother, sister, cousin, friend or relative who has promised but failed us in time past, and because of that, our hatred towards them knows no bound. That your rich uncle working in an oil company or in government house whom you thought ought to give a job or money to start up your business. Your aunty, who was meant to pay your fees when things were rough but didn’t look your way, and for you hold her accountable for your failure in life? your brother, who before he went abroad promised you heaven on earth, but has not even sent you a tie till date? Am sure these examples typify the great percentage of us out there and if your answer is yes, it means you are part of the Moan and Groan group expecting others to do something for you, rather than focusing on what you can do for yourself.
Entitlement mentality – no one owes you anything
Active readers, there is nothing intrinsically wrong with these examples, but the fact is, you cannot compel someone to do your bidding especially when you are in no position to. It is totally up to them, if they want to help you or not, it’s their choice and decision to make. Upon inspection, it is pure madness to keep feeling entitled, come down from your high horse my friend,nobody owes you anything, if people choose to give or help you, it’s out of their own volition and conviction, you have to be grateful. Entitlement mentality is the reason why we are so ungrateful we keep taking and expecting more, when we can’t even do the same for others. You are given a ride home, by a good Samaritan who saw you standing under the rain, the next thing is you are feeling like Queen Sheba saying to yourself, it’s because he wanted to ask me out. Even the security guards in offices, seeing you in a fancy car, would expect you to drop something and you can instantly see the reaction on their faces if you don’t tip them, thank your stars if you dont even hear them insulting you.
Why do you expect people to take care of your own problems, and if they don’t, you fault and put them down? You blame your parents, children, government, husband, wife even the devil for your current state, playing the role of a victim, instead of taking responsibility for your life. You expect everything from people other than yourself because you are what? Why can’t you get a job, raise the resources, do that project, instead of being a burden. What is stopping you from succeeding? To be fair, lets also learn to remember that, this people you have blacklisted have their own challenges they are dealing with and if they promised and failed you, its normal, that’s life. We err as humans, and even when you think it was done intentionally, move on with your life, take it has a lesson not to put your trust in man, make it a challenge to succeed not depending on people for survival.
It is incredibly important to understand that, the only person that is responsible for getting you what you want in life is yourself. We create our own reality; you alone have the ultimate power to shape your future. This new year, you can’t keep depending and placing your expectations on people. Instead, keep in mind that service and gratitude fuels relationships and expectations poisons it. There is no other way to spin it, the world owes you nothing. Get rid of your entitlement mentality.
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